Finding balance as a parent
Finding balance as a parent is different for everyone.
Depending on the ages and stages of your children, what you do for a living, whether or not you have a partner, and what other natural supports are in place, your parenthood journey is unique to you.
From a single-parents’ perspective
At first I really just threw myself into parenting and put most, if not all, of my needs to the side.
By the time my second child was born, I felt more prepared. I had a community of like-minded women to parent alongside and a well of social media accounts, blogs and podcasts to draw wisdom from.
I learned how to meal prep, batch cook, and bake for the week.
I read lots of articles and social media posts, and took several parenting courses and workshops to ensure I was becoming the best parent I could be.
Once my youngest turned one, I made the difficult choice to find a daycare for my children to attend twice a week so I could begin the process of returning to work, and found a new counsellor to help me heal from the separation from my kiddos father.
Here’s what I have learned:
5 keys to balancing life as a parent
1. Create a routine - If you aren’t sure where to start, consider tracking what you’re already doing to see what works, and mark the days that went well so when you circle back to the scheduling process, you will have the tools you need to tailor a daily routine that suits your family’s needs.
2. Set boundaries - Age appropriate house rules, rewards, and consequences, that serve the highest good are especially important because they allow for a child to develop empathy and mature into a more resilient and connected adult by understanding cause and effect. “If you hit your sister, I can’t reward you with icecream!” is a much better consequence for example than, “If you hit your sister, you’re going for a time out.”
3. Create a connection with your child - Creating a daily ritual with your child for one-on-one time, either to play with them or just spend time with them, ensuring your children know you’re there for them on a regular basis is the goal here.
4. Self care and reflection - Journaling, meditation, baths, prayer, and exercise are all forms of self care that go beyond essential care, such as taking showers and running out for groceries. Taking time for yourself is essential to creating the inner balance that you need to be the best you that you can be.
5. Ask for help - Whether it’s finding a counsellor to vent to, inviting your partner or a family friend to help you get your kids to the pool, or investing in a housekeeper once or twice a month, admitting that you need it, and asking for help is an essential part of finding balance as a parent.
If you aren’t sure where to turn and don’t have anyone in your immediate circle you feel safe talking to, one of our counsellors can help you explore coping strategies. Reach out today.
Twyla Siple is a content writer for MLC & Co. who lives alone with her two young children in Calgary, Alberta. She believes in the power of sharing personal stories to help her readers feel empowered through connection in knowing we are all in this thing called life together.